Title: Don't Let It Go To Waste (Part 3 of 3)
Author: kinkynickyRating: NC-17
Summary: Growing up in
Texas is hard. Growing up in Texas and realising at the age of 16 that you’re in love with your male best friend? Is harder.
Words: 14,054 (posted in three parts due to length)
( Part 3 - Section Two )
Not talking to Jensen was easier than he’d thought it would be.
Both of them managed to accidentally convince Tom and Mike that they were fighting over a girl, and typically those two went about trying to work out which girl it was instead of consoling either of them. Jared ate alone just like before High School and stopped half-heartedly dating girls, in fact, he started to ignore the ones in Jensen’s circle completely.
Jeff stopped kicking his ass because he stopped stealing the car, having nowhere to go now, aside from the library which was barely a five minute walk away. His mom was proud of him all over again when his grades went back up to how they’d been before he started dating and drinking, and she commended his seriousness.
Nobody asked him why Jensen stopped coming over to the house, and Jared guessed that they too were assuming a girl had come between them. He found himself wishing it was that simple.
One day Chad started talking to him in class, something random and unimportant, but Jared found himself thankful for the conversation, and before he knew it he suddenly had a new eating buddy, and rather accidentally, a new crowd. Just like Tom and Mike, Chad’s friends accepted Jared openly.
Being in a group that had girls in it was new. Chad may have been an asshole but when he was friends with a girl, he really did try his best to look after her. Unless he was the one doing the hurting, of course. Chad’s friends hadn’t known each other forever, but they were all close and fun to be around.
More than anything, Jared was thankful that he’d found a few people to talk to.
James was dating Bethany, they had been for a while now, even talking about an engagement that made Jared want to roll his eyes. After six months of dating, Chad had cheated on his girlfriend Sophia with her friend Hilarie. Miraculously, she’d been mature enough to remain friends with both of them, though Jared got the feeling that trust was a huge issue between the three of them. When he asked, Sophia had informed him that she didn’t feel the need to depend on a man to know who she was.
The couple situation meant that Jared ended up spending most of his time with Sophia while the others made out, and that was fine, because she was nice. Both her and James were a year above everybody else, so she made an effort to act mature. Every once in a while she’d get a cheeky smirk creasing her dimpled cheeks and Jared would know she’d done something naughty. She was fun to be around. The kind of person Jared tried to be, able to deal with issues without throwing them around in other people’s faces.
Perfect friend material. Not Jensen-perfect, but to be fair, thirteen years was hard to beat.
~.~
One day at lunch, he’d sat at the table, face close to Sophia’s as they’d glanced down at the calc work she wanted him to look over, and Bethany had suddenly grabbed both their wrists across the table and stared wide-eyed.
“You guys…” she muttered, motioning to the others, her mouth lifting into a smile as she glanced from Jared’s face to Sophia’s and back again. “Don’t they look alike?”
Four sets of eyes landed upon them as Jared lifted his own.
“Holy shit, Beth.” James rumbled, nodding, before lifting his finger to point. “The moles and the cheekbones…the dimples and the squinty eyes.” And the staring only got harder as Chad joined in, rambling about long necks and shiny brown hair. It made Jared want to squirm or cover his face with the calc book.
“Wow. Weird.” Hilarie muttered, eyes flicking from one to the other.
But Sophia had just shrugged and threw an arm around Jared’s neck, planting a gloss-sticky kiss on his cheek. “It’s not weird. We’re completely brain-twins.”
~.~
The protective vibe came pretty quick. She was smaller than him – seemed tough, sure, but Jared saw right through that façade, noticed every time the corners of her mouth turned downwards before she lifted them into a fake smile. Each time she opened up a little more for him, each time she let him get a little bit closer, all just made Jared want to wrap her in his arms and not let her go.
It was new to him.
He tried not to let little things niggle at him, silly things like the way guys would turn their heads and study her whenever she entered a room – not that she discouraged the attention most of the time, fluttering her eye lashes, amused.
Tom had always groaned low in his chest every time she walked by, his eyes following her like a hungry puppy following food, and Mike would slap him on the shoulder and say “Just talk to her, Tommy.”
His answer was always the same. “I can’t, its not the same as with everyone else. I don’t have anything to lose with any of the others. Sophia Bush? I don’t know. I guess maybe I like her too much.”
Each time they had the conversation, Jared would fight not to glance over at Jensen. He knew exactly what Tom meant.
~.~
It didn’t take them long to know each other almost inside out, so it really shouldn’t have been a surprise when Sophia asked him exactly how in love with Jensen Ackles he was.
He’d sat in silence and she’d only hugged him and smiled, telling him that the answer was to take a hot girl – herself – to prom for the night and forget all about his stupid friend who obviously couldn’t see how perfect he was.
The plan went full speed ahead without much input from him, not that he minded much, apart from when she’d forced him into a tailor’s and picked out his tux, not correcting the guy when he told her they didn’t get many customers as tall as her boyfriend.
The suit wasn’t bad, but Jared still felt like a penguin suffocating in its own skin, and Sophia completely forbid him changing it at all. “This is why being friends with a girl is a bad idea.” He mumbled, staring at his own reflection in the wall-length mirror, and she only laughed, resting her head on his arm with a happy sigh.
And really, she had the nicest smile. Jared knew a thousand times over that if he wasn’t so in love with Jensen, and so absolutely gay, then he’d completely be head over heels for her.
“You gonna give me the best prom night ever?” she asked quietly as they stood, both staring at each other in the mirror.
Jared grinned his blinding smile and dropped a kiss on her head. “You betcha. Now get this bowtie off of me before I die of prom-wear strangulation.”
~.~
Chad and Hilarie were in the same grade as Jared, which of course meant that they weren’t officially invited to the prom. Not that Chad ever let a thing like that stop him.
“Man, its sucks ass that we’re not just allowed to this thing.” He mumbled in the dinner queue, picking already at the fries he’d picked up. His expression was petulant and reminded Jared of a child. “We’re totally going anyway, it’d just be easier.”
Jared shook his head and chuckled. “It’s not your prom. You don’t need two, why can’t you just wait until ours?”
Chad threw him an incredulous look. “You’re going to this one. Why should I miss out on all the fun just cause my date isn’t a senior?”
Rolling his eyes, Jared sighed. “It’s not my prom, it’s Sophia’s.” he replied, wanting to smack Chad when he pulled a retarded face and then pouted some more.
“How are things going with you and Soph, anyways?” Stuffing more fries into his mouth, Chad looked up at Jared, who only shrugged. He’d become aware that most people assumed he was dating Sophia. Neither of them had exactly done anything to discourage the rumours. “Fucked her yet?”
Hard to believe that only months before, this was the guy in Sophia’s life. Shoving Chad’s shoulder, Jared scoffed. “Man, you’re a pig.”
Chad looked more proud than anything, and at that, Jared rolled his eyes again. Grinning, Chad raised his eyebrows. “That’s a yes. That is so a yes.”
Jared was prepared to let him think that.
~.~
Of course, Sophia being Jensen’s age meant that prom night for her was also prom night for Jensen. There was no doubt he’d have a dumb blonde in tow. Jared wasn’t altogether positive he was ready to see Jensen out on a proper date.
“Don’t worry about it. You’ll look way prettier tonight than any skank he’ll have on his arm.” Sophia whispered to him in the limo, so close to him that Chad gave him the thumbs up from across the limo where Hilarie was trying to suck a hole in his neck.
“Pretty?” Jared whispered back, trying to catch a glimpse of himself in one of the hanging mirrors.
Laying a quick kiss on his cheek, Sophia smiled a little sadly, and Jared wondered if maybe she wasn’t just a little bit in love with him. “Yeah. Pretty in a guy way.” She concluded, nodding and fixing his bowtie just a little bit, before turning a mirror towards herself and reapplying her lip-gloss. “Nervous?”
As the limo pulled up in front of the school, and the muffled voices of excited students filtered in through the open sunroof James had just been hanging out of, Jared took a deep breath, and shook his head. “No. I’m fine. This’ll be good.”
He really believed it too, right up until he walked into the hall, just in time to see Jensen posing at the entrance for a picture with his date. He’d brought Kristen Kreuk. Figures. Smart and pretty. Jensen used to talk about her all the time.
That is, you know, when he wasn’t too busy with his tongue in Jared’s mouth.
Sighing, Jared tried to wipe the bitter look from his face. The last thing he wanted was to ruin Sophia’s night. He could handle this. Besides, Sophia was way wittier and way prettier than Kristen could ever hope to be, so really, Jared figured, he’d won.
By the time Sophia shook him out of his thoughts, Jensen and Kristen were gone, and Chad was in front of the camera, successfully ruining Hilarie’s prom night photograph. Thankfully for her, there was lots of time to find someone more mature before the next one.
“We don’t have to do all that if you don’t want.” Sophia pointed to the camera, shaking her head a little and shrugging one shoulder, but Jared rolled his eyes and dragged her over anyway, wrapping an arm around her waist and shooting a genuine smile in the direction of the camera.
The grateful look she gave him was one of a hundred that she’d send in his direction that night, and each time, Jared just shook his head.
An hour into the night, and things were going alright, Jared relaxing even as Sophia dragged him to the dance floor and slung her arms around his neck. He pulled her close and made the appropriate amount of movement for the songs that played, eyes closed as he laid his cheek against her hair and sighed. He liked this. She was familiar and comfortable in a non-threatening way. She smelled good, and wrapped herself around him like the girls he used to date, like he could protect them if they needed it. He smiled. Then he opened his eyes and the whole thing went to hell.
Cause there was Jensen across the dance floor. Staring at him. Actually looking a little shocked.
“Look at his face,” Sophia was on her tiptoes now, sharing the whisper as close to Jared’s ear as she could get. “He can’t believe that you’re here.” He was listening to her, he really was, but Jensen kind of hadn’t looked away yet, and Jared kind of didn’t want to either. Something about openly staring at one another was at the same time awkward but so familiarly comfortable that Jared could barely blink. Sophia sighed. “I don’t know why he’s so surprised; the whole school assumes that we’re dating…”
Jared smiled a little, shaking his head as he blew out a laugh, looking down at her. “And you have no idea how often I wish it was true.” She smiled up at him then, pieces of soft hair settling around her face, her autumn eyes sparkling. “Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?”
She sighed heavily, her smile widening even as she closed her eyes, shaking her head a little. “God, Jared.” Resting her forehead against his chest, she took a deep breath, moving back a little to look up at him again. “Will you stop being so damn perfect and go get me some punch before I do something stupid like fall in love with you?”
Her words hit him hard, and he nodded, letting his lips brush her forehead before he stepped away, hands finding their way into his pockets. “Sorry.”
“Punch, Jared.” She smiled, shaking her head and turning to go sit back down at their table.
He watched her go, back to where Hilarie was shoving Chad around, ordering him to dance with her, and couldn’t help but grin. With a shake of his head he spun on his heel, aiming for the punch table.
He didn’t see Jensen until he got there.
Standing with his back to the dance floor, Jensen was holding one of the red plastic cups in his hand, and appeared to be smelling the contents. It made Jared want to frown and laugh at the same time, especially when Jensen wrinkled his nose a little and leaned across to peer into the punchbowl with a frown of his own.
Right then, Jared missed him so much it hurt. They’d never been malicious, never badmouthed each other. They’d just sort of avoided each other. Now he was here, Jared wasn’t going to ignore him.
“Hi.”
Without even turning to look at him, Jensen raised a plastic cup to Jared’s face, asking casually, “Does this smell like it’s been spiked to you? I swear I saw your buddy Chad over here with a flask earlier.”
“It wouldn’t surprise me.” Sniffing the cup in question, Jared pulled a face at the bitter edge the scent carried and chuckled a little bit, meeting Jensen’s eyes when he finally turned his head. “Okay, yeah, almost definitely.”
Jensen chuckled too, nodding. “Thought so.” Taking the cup, hand brushing Jared’s fingers in a way they ignored, he poured the contents back into the punch bowl and turned to lean against the table with his arms crossed. He was silent for a moment, just looking over at Jared thoughtfully. “How are you, Jay?”
“Busy.” Jared nodded, letting the corner of his mouth lift upwards towards a smile. “You know, busy with school, finding myself a job…trying to keep Chad on a leash.”
Jensen’s laughter was like water after a drought, his eyes crinkling at the edges, making laugh lines he probably shouldn’t have yet, the deep rumbling amusement meeting Jared’s ears. He’d had forgotten how intoxicating it was. “Yeah, he needs that, for sure.”
It was almost as if the past months hadn’t even happened, conversation coming easy and random like it always had, Jensen’s laugh making Jared feel light-headed even without the aid of Chad’s special punch.
He wasn’t sure how long they’d been there for, just talking, when mid-sentence he felt a strong arm wrap around his shoulder and neck, and he was pulled against the solid body of Tom, crooning, “Little Jared” as he nodded at Jensen, his smile wide as always. Jared, an inch if not more, taller than Tom let the nickname slide, tilting his head to study the look on Tommy’s face. “You boys all sweet and friendly again or what?”
When neither of them answered, Tom just shrugged with a sigh and turned to Jared, patting a big hand on his chest. “Hey, so…I know she’s your girl and everything, but I was thinking that maybe I could, you know, dance with Sophia for a song or somethin?”
The end of the question was accompanied by an enthusiastic swing of his hips and Jared couldn’t help but grin. Despite the warmth that spread in his chest at the identification of Sophia as his girl, one glance over to the table where she sat, watching Chad and Hilarie with a tiny frown made everything clear.
“Sure, man.” He nodded, lifting his hands and gesturing loosely. “Just…you know. Hands to yourself.”
Nudging him in the ribs, Tom’s smile got impossibly wider. “I’ll try.” He nodded to both Jared and Jensen as he backed away from them, turning with a final wink and marching in the direction of Sophia, determined. Jared watched as he leant over her right shoulder and spoke into her ear, something that made her smile and nod. Then they were walking hand in hand to the dance floor.
When Jared turned back to Jensen, the look he got was incredulous. “Jared, you just let him make off with your date.”
The roll of eyes was automatic, the answer even more so. “She’s not my type.”
“Right.” Jensen nodded, attempting a smile, awkward but not completely unnatural looking, like maybe he was finally actually getting used to the idea. “Course not. But she’s still your date.”
Shrugging, Jared moved to lean on the table next to Jensen, close enough to smell his cologne, but not close enough to make him uncomfortable, crossing his arms and mimicking Jensen’s posture. “We’re just friends. ‘sides, you know Tom really likes her.”
Jensen only had to lean slightly to his left in order to nudge Jared with his shoulder, and he did, throwing a smile as he stood up. “I guess I better get back to Kristen, go and explain why I haven’t got any punch.” He made to walk away, before turning back as if he’d thought better of it. “Hey…it was good talking to you, Jay.”
“Yeah.” Jared nodded. “You too.”
When he got back to the table, Hilarie had given up on Chad and gone to dance on her own before being ambushed –quite willingly- by Bryan Greenberg from the basketball team,, and Sophia was all tangled up inTom, laughing and smiling about something he’d said while they swayed to the music. Jared didn’t mind so much. He did kind of wish he’d picked up some of the spiked punch though.
~.~
An hour later found Jared sat on the sidewalk glaring up at Chad, shaking his head as the blonde shoved another tissue ball up his nose in order to stop the bleeding.
“You’re such an asshole. You couldn’t leave it alone, could you?”
Chad rolled his eyes and kicked at the ground, turning once more on the look out for a cab. “Not you too, man. She’s my girl, she can’t just fucking dance with someone else in front of me. That douche should have seen my fist coming.”
Jared couldn’t help but laugh, not amused in the slightest by Chad, but completely dumbfounded, once again, by his arrogance. “A? You wouldn’t dance with her yourself and B? He did see your fist coming, which is why you’re the one with a tissue up your nose and your tail between your legs.” As a long sigh escaped him, Jared closed his eyes, leaning his head against the wall. “I’m missing Sophia’s prom because you’re an idiot.”
Snorting, Chad threw away the last of his bloodied tissue. “It’s not like she’s missing you now that Welling’s fawning all over her.”
And well, that was true enough.
~.~
Much as he’d expected her to be mad, one stern look and Sophia was over it. She made him pay by talking his ears off about Tom while they sat, cross-legged on her bed filing their way through college application forms and advice booklets.
“…and then he said that he wanted to take me out sometime, if I didn’t mind. He’s so sweet and shy, I didn’t think he’d be like that but I swear he was almost stuttering. I said yes, so he’s taking me out someplace on Tuesday.”
Without glancing up from the sheet on his lap, Jared heard her rambling stop, and nodded. “That’s great, Sophia.”
“You’re not even listening to me, are you?” Kneeling up on the bed, she placed her hands on her hips, raised one perfectly-shaped brow, and snatched the ‘Brown University’ paper from him, reading over it with a frown, screwing it up.
“What’re you doing? I was reading that.” Standing up Jared reached for the paper ball in her hand and opened it carefully, going over to her desk and laying it out, trying to smooth it with his hands. “I am listening. You’re talking about Tom. Again.”
“You’re pretending to listen. You know, anytime you want to bitch, moan or swoon about Jensen, there I am, listening avidly to what you have to say, but you won’t give me the time of day when it’s the other way around.” Coming to stand next to him, she leaned sideways on the desk, glancing around him at what he was doing. “And then you freak out over some application to a college I’m not even applying to. I mean, really, at which moment in time did you lose your mind, because as your best friend, I’d have at least liked a memo or something.”
That time he didn’t block her out when she talked too much, because she sounded upset and he hated that, knowing Sophia could pout with the best of them. Putting aside the stupid sick feeling in the pit of his stomach when she made claims of being his best friend, she was right. Looking back down at the paper, Jared sighed.
He’d been quiet for so long that Sophia leaned around him again, to see his face, to see the application form again. “Oh.” she whispered from behind him, like she’d suddenly realised what was wrong. “Is this where he’s going?”
“I don’t know.” Jared sighed, one shoulder lifting in a shrug. “He used to talk about it.”
“Rhode Island…it’s pretty far away.” She whispered, leaning around him once again to catch his expression. Jared figured he mustn’t have been hiding his feelings very well, since she wrapped her arms around him from behind. “Maybe…” she whispered, gentle and full of hope, her hand smoothing the material of his shirt in a soothing way. “Maybe you could convince him to stay?”
He liked that about her. Despite whatever she’d gone through, that thing they never talked about that had given her a rough edge, she was always gently hopeful about things. Jared wished he was the same…wished he had the inclination to try.
~.~
Jared had barely walked through the door when his mom pounced on him.
“Jared, for god’s sake, change your shirt. Alan and Donna are on their way over for dinner.” Shaking her head she marched into the kitchen, fixing her apron as she went, and Jared followed behind her, open-mouthed and panicking a little.
“With Jensen?” She ignored him, humming to herself as she checked the stove, changing temperatures on the gas pegs and then leaning over to check inside the oven. Tugging on her apron he felt like a toddler again. “Mom! Is Jensen coming for dinner?!”
Nudging him away with an unreadable expression, she nodded. “Now I know you boys haven’t been talking for a little while, but Jared…he’s graduating soon. He won’t be here much longer; I just thought it’d be nice for us all to have dinner together.”
She barely got the words out before he raced upstairs to his room, throwing his shirt off in the hallway and running into the blur of pigtails and pink that was Megan, flicking her ear when she poked him in the belly before running off.
“Brat.” He muttered to himself kicking the bedroom door closed with his foot and opening his wardrobe. Damn, he hadn’t bought anything new to wear in a long time – aside from his prom night penguin-suit, and somehow he thought that might be a little too much for dinner. Not that he wanted to seem like he was making an effort or anything. Clearly, he needed Sophia.
- “Jensen’s coming over, I need your help.”
- “Over where? When? Now?!”
- “Tonight. Right now. Dinner, my house, Jensen and his whole family. Help me.”
- “Happy to.”
- “What the hell do I wear?”
Once she’d stopped laughing enough to give him a straight answer, she’d told him to just wear something that made him feel comfortable, and so he’d settled with his favourite shirt. Yeah, he’d had it a while, but it still fit and he loved it. Jensen had seen him in it a million times which proved he wasn’t trying too hard.
Yeah. This worked.
~.~
When they arrived, Jensen gave Jared a nod and they were all ushered into the living room. Megan and McKenzie managed to sneak off somewhere and Donna followed Sherri into the kitchen, leaving Jensen and Jared to sit in silence and listen to their father’s conversation. It took all of five seconds for them to try and incorporate the boys into their conversation.
“So, Jensen. Rhode Island. You excited?” Both of their fathers were smiling, but Jared couldn’t help but frown at the conformation that Jensen would be going to Brown. It was too damn far away.
“Yes sir.” Jensen nodded, clasping his hands together. “Be sorry to go though.”
“Nonsense.” Alan’s smoky laugh filled the room and he clapped his son on the shoulder. “You’ll be back soon enough. The minute your laundry starts to overflow. We should do something your first break, the four of us. Go fishing or camping for the weekend.”
“Sounds good.” Jensen smiled, but Jared rolled his eyes. They always did this, his dad and Alan. Planned a trip camping or a weekend at the lake and then forgot about it. The one camping trip they’d ever been on had turned out a disaster when Jensen had broken three bones in his foot following Jared into a freezing stream. Having not jumped far enough, he’d hit the rocks. Alan had had to carry him halfway down the mountain back to the car, where he’d sat crying with an icepack wrapped around his foot while their father’s had taken down the tent.
Jared was about to call bullshit on the three of them when his mom announced that he needed to set the table.
~.~
Sitting down at the table with Jensen across from him was familiar and new at the same time. Familiar in that it felt the same, their parents and little sister’s opposite sides of them, a formula they’re practised many times – but different in that, this time, Jensen wouldn’t even meet his eyes.
In fact, at some point in the night, Jensen had decided that the tablecloth was much more interesting than anything anybody wanted to say, and from then on, he’d barely even looked up to eat. It was borderline ridiculous, and after their conversation at prom, Jared wasn’t sure whether he was disappointed or pissed.
“So, why Brown?” He didn’t mean to sound as angry as he did – he didn’t meant to speak at all in fact, but when he had, Jared felt just a little empowered and sat, waiting for the answer, glaring not-subtly in the direction of his best friend.
When Jensen’s eyes rose up and met his, Jensen looked a little confused and a lot put-out, but Jared refused to look away. It was only a question. “You know I’ve always wanted to go to Brown.”
He couldn’t help but release a puff of hair. Maybe it sounded a little like bitter laughter, he didn’t care. “So it has nothing to do with me? Getting away from me?”
Shifting his eyes to their parents at both ends of the table, Jensen closed his eyes and screwed up his face like he was getting a headache. “Do we have to do this now?”
And he could see Jensen getting angrier, recognised the twitching clench of his jaw and the way he couldn’t even open his eyes. Jared, to his credit, and probably the annoyance of Jensen, managed to stay calm. “You’re going away. When else would I get the chance?”
“At your parent’s dinner table? Grow up, Jared. All night I’ve been hanging around waiting for you to come and ask me, try and resolve something. I’m at your house, the ball is in your court, but no, instead you just sat there, and now, now that everybody is here to see, now is when you want to talk?”
“Ask you what?” But Jensen was up and almost out the room before Jared could even finish his question, leaving Alan to mutter something about giving him a minute of space.
And if Jared had thought that confronting Jensen was going to present him with any kind of answer? He was wrong, because all he was left with his more confusion.
~.~
Jensen did eventually come back inside, and Jared left him alone to eat, unable to keep himself from glancing up every few seconds.
He let out a huge sigh and everybody but Jensen looked over at him, Megan and McKenzie sitting silent and wide-eyed as they stared. Everything had gone to hell.
Just as things were winding down, everybody getting ready to leave, Donna finding McKenzie and making her put on her coat and Alan saying his goodbye’s in the kitchen, Jared found his way out back and, taking a deep breath of the cool night air, he’d heard a voice behind him. “…Jay.”
Eyes open suddenly, Jared turned to see Jensen standing, mouth open ready with something to say, and then from inside the house, “Jensen? Come on, we need to get Kenzie home to bed.”
Eyes never leaving Jared’s, Jensen shrugged and smiled apologetically. “Never mind.”
~.~
He was in bed that night kicking himself for causing an argument at the table when his phone rang.
He picked up throwing out a sleepy “Hello?” expecting Chad or James, somebody calling to tell him something stupid that he didn’t care about, and he just wasn’t in the mood.
“Kristen’s pretty perfect.” The voice in Jared’s ear made him pause, the words hardly even penetrating his mind before Jensen continued. “I mean, in terms of the fact that she looks, acts and has the personality of a modern goddess, she’s pretty perfect.”
Jared frowned. “Sure, if you’re into tiny, overly-smart kind of people with weird eyes.”
Not quite sure why, four hours after he’d left, Jensen would call him up and declare how perfect his prom date was, Jared sat up, curious and not at all prepared to be talking to Jensen right now.
“That’s the thing.” Jensen’s answer was muttered, his tone so tired and his voice so heavy that Jared forgot to raise his guard. “I think I kind of…might be into tall, overly-smart people with weird hair.”
It was a pretty unsubtle statement, but after everything, Jared was too smart to hope that Jensen could be talking about him. Only, not really. “What?”
“Prom night, I’m in this hotel room, and Kristen is sitting there, well, lying there really, on the bed, and I’m sort of standing over her…and I should be thinking about how much I want to fuck her, and how perfect she is and how lucky I am to be her prom date.”
There was a rush of noise as Jensen blew out a breath, and Jared realised that he himself had forgotten to breathe, waiting for Jensen to just get to the point, stop talking around everything like he always did and just say it for once.
“And instead, all I can think about is how much I hated seeing you dance so close to Sophia fucking Bush, and how fucking…pretty you looked in that tux, with your hair gelled back and that half-dead rose in your pocket.” There was a pause so long that Jared wasn’t sure he was going to continue, but he did, his voice heavier. “And then tonight at dinner, in your stupid shirt, which, man? Way too small for you.” Jared wasn’t sure whether to blush or smile. “I still had to glare at that ugly tablecloth to avoid staring at you.”
Pretty much the minute he’d heard Jensen’s voice his heart had picked up speed, but the minute those words tumbled, clumsy yet assured from Jensen’s mouth, it had doubled all over again. At some point he really was going to have to remember to breathe.
“I’ve never looked at a guy that way. Ever, Jay.” Jensen’s voice quieted, and Jared could barely hear it over his own heartbeat in his ears. “Say something.”
There was a lot he could have said, things he could have brought up, been angry, confused or hurt about. Instead, Jared let his lips twitch upwards into a smile and finally took that breath, letting it out inside and little laugh. “…you took your time.”
~.~
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Part One I Part Two l Part Three A I Part Three B I Epilogue 
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calm![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
excited
hopeful
distracted![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small}
1 (4.5%)
pessimistic
creative
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blah
crazy
contemplative
sleepy
drained
curious
anxious
chipper